If you are like many contemplating a divorce, you have been thinking, stewing, trying to work it out, justifying staying, justifying leaving, and have finally reached the end of your rope, but you dont know the first thing about getting a divorce or where to even begin, you are not alone.
Before you and your spouse make the final decison to part ways it is important to know that you have exhausted all your remedies prior to seeking a divorce. It is important to seek counseling both as a couple and as individuals from a marriage and family therapist, someone at your place of worship, or an objective person that you and your spouse feel comfortable talking and sharing with.
Getting a divorce is a very painful and trying journey, much akin to a death. It has been my experience that people are much stronger throughout the journey if they know that they did all they could to save the marriage, rather than having lingering doubts that they are making the right decision.
If you have tried the above and still think divorce is the only remedy for your sitaution, a good place to begin is to have a confidential consultation with an attorney who can give you an idea of what effect a divorce will have on your children (custodially speaking) your house, your retirment, and all other assests that you and your spouse acquired during your marriage, and even those acquired prior to marriage.
If after speaking with an attorney, a divorce is still what you are after, the process begins with finding the right attorney. You may feel comfortable with the attorney that you consulted with, you may want to find someone else. If there are no assets and no children the divorce can usually be done without involving attorneys at all. If there are assets and children, but the relationship between you and your spouse is very amicable, you may also be able to forego retaining legal representation.
The most important thing is that you think long and hard about the decision to divorce and exhaust all other remedies before ending the marriage, because no matter how amicable or simple, it is never easy.